While wrestling fans in the Western Hemisphere are anxiously anticipating the WWE Draft on Smackdown tonight, the program has already aired in Australia, where people live in the future.

Fans in Australia, who somehow don’t fall off the Earth despite living upside-down on the underside of the globe, witnessed the groundbreaking “brand split” 11 hours ago, and were treated to such surprises as:

• The draft of JoJo to Smackdown
• The draft of Babyface Big Show to Raw and Heel Big Show to Smackdown
• The main-roster “call-up” of six top NXT rookies: Zack Ryder, No Way Jose, Tino Sabbatelli, Peyton Royce, Liv Morgan, and Shane Thorne.
• The much-anticipated return of Nathan Jones
• The recruitment of Roman Reigns to Superstars

“Crikey,” tweeted one fan after the surprise return of Kurt Angle. “G’day, crikey dingo barbie croc!”

Some skeptics have questioned the veracity of these results, insisting that Australians do not actually live in the future. But how do those skeptics explain that it is currently Wednesday morning in Australia? Dummies.

 

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